Scenes from everyday MRT commute:

(Chubby lady #1 squeezes herself in the last remaining space the size of a postage stamp.  She barely fits, yet still pulls her companion inside the train with her.)

Chubby lady #1:  Dali, pasok, kasya ka pa! (Chubby lady #2 tries to enter, but only her right leg and shoulder gets in)

Chubby lady #2:  Sure ka?  Hindi na, o!

Chubby lady #1:  Oo naman, bilis! (Tries to move further inside train, but hits  a wall of unmoving bodies – bodies that can no longer move however badly they want to! Whistle sounds.)

Guard:  Miss, hindi na kayo kasya kahit ano gawin nyo!

(Chubby Lady #1 finally gives up and both ladies step back onto the platform. Yours truly quickly hops into the space vacated by the ladies.  My much thinner frame fits, but barely.)

******

Another MRT evening:

Platform filled almost to capacity.  Train pulls in, stops, and a horde of ladies converge through a 2 1/2 foot-wide opening.  I give up and stand still on the platform, seeing that there’s no more space inside.  The next thing I know, I am inside – and quite a way inside, not merely by the door!  Someone from the back gave a mighty push that allowed around 5 people to get in before the doors closed.  Said one lady:  “Sino yun?  Ang lakas, ah!” Laughter all around.

******

And yet another evening:

Guadalupe station – Crowd of ladies rush in.  One tried to squeeze herself between another lady and the door.  Lady #2 wasn’t happy about it since there wasn’t much room so she pushed out Lady #1 – and quite hard!  Lady #1 tried to squeeze in again, but was pushed out once more.  Once she got her bearing on the platform, a screaming match ensued, consisting of these statements:  “Mag-taxi ka kung ayaw mong masiksik!”  “Ikaw ang mag-taxi!” “Mag-taksi ka!”  “Ikaw ang mag-taxi!” Over and over, until mercifully, the doors closed.

******

Lastly…I got my second “MRT injury” last night.  I have a 3-inch scratch on the inside of my right arm.  Someone again tried to do the impossible and scraped my arm with something she was carrying.  My previous injury was a very painful bruise.  Someone in stillettos stepped on my flipflop-shod foot.   Ouch!

If only the MRT would be like the Weasleys’ Ford Anglia or the Ministry of Magic’s cars.

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